When we read something, we try to visualise how the writer sounds like, where s/he would have punctuated, paused and stressed upon. The understanding of these nuances make a good read and if I can help you understand my voice without telling you that I sound like Reynolds and look like Gosling, I would consider myself blessed with the art.
Think of my voice as the narration of those 90s rom-com movies, for your own sake.
Happiness Project
Once upon a time, because every good story begins with that, I came to the crossroads with the instance that almost everyone does at some point in their life. I stood at someplace I can’t remember for the life of me and saw people around me rushing just to reach somewhere. I feel it is not even borderline romantic to say that I had an epiphany about that but that is when it struck me “where am I going”?
The question is mindboggling in itself. There is no answer to this question, there is only getting used to it as we get wiser(older). Although, I realized I can make efforts to be conscious of where I am and where I am going.
Happiness Project is an attempt to write the journey in every strange and odd aspect of life described as weirdly awesome.
It is in no way “the way” to achieve happiness.
It is in no way “the guide” to achieve happiness.
It is in no way “the mantra” to achieve happiness.
It is my quest in pursuing true happiness without going to exile!
“the emoji experiment”
One of the first ideas that came to mind when I started thinking about happiness is my friends, family and everyone I love. Every person we are in a relationship with, we build them through the act of communication, both verbal and non-verbal. In this context, non-verbal is everything tangible we do. In this project, I decided to take on the verbal aspect of it given the subjectivity of the non-verbal one.
The whole synopsis was: how can I be more authentic in every relationship I have and I build. I started observing my behaviour very consciously while texting.
It was evident without crunching any data that I was using emojis as an escape mechanism. I would send emojis as an autoresponse where I did not want to think much or did not have much to say. Keep an eye out when you are using an emoticon next time and why you are using it.
It was clear what I had to do for the project.
I made a list of reasons based on my observations to ensure that I was doing the right thing to keep me going.
Easier Emotional Expression
When we think about it, emojis just crept into our lives unannounced and have continued their stay. We don’t think explicitly about them because we don’t buy them. They made it easier to be sarcastic, happy, sad or to feel and express 700 other emotions.
Question the Norm
The rebel in me wrote this title. It is important to understand the usage and implications of anything before we decide to adopt or eradicate it from our life. The emoji experiment is an endeavour to question the norm of using emojis as a part of our communication.
Vulnerability
I agree that every easy option is not necessarily morally objectionable but in this case, I observed myself to be hiding behind a stream of emoticons when I did not have anything to say or did not want to be perceived as impolite. It was in a way holding me back from being vulnerable.
The Gap filled with Gibber
I observed that I started using emojis to fill in the gaps between conversations. There are points in life when we either don’t know what to say or are just merely filling in the gap.
The former is restricting vulnerability. The latter is because I wasn’t paying as much attention as I should have because I had a shortcut: emojis.
My ego
I am a writer, first, before I’m anything else. If I couldn’t convey how I feel, with words and only words, I do not deserve to call myself that.
This is the point where you need to ask yourself the same questions and understand if emojis are affecting your life in any way? There are no short term significant impacts because it is unnoticeable at first, eg. social media(a whole other project in progress).
Rules of the emoji experiment
Do not use emoji’s in any form of communication under any circumstances.
Follow rule 1 to death!
I also would like to point out here that I’m not some anti-social pariah or a person who hates technology. I am a passionate technology fan and believe that technology when used right can and is changing the world.
Side note: Before we progress to the life of the experiment(involving personal life anecdotes), I feel we should get to know each other a little better. If you are not subscribed yet, you can and we could start a writer-reader active relationship.
The life of the experiment
I embarked on this experiment on December 2nd, 2020. The pandemic lockdown was still in effect.
Ever had that itch in your ear of hearing the phone ping even when there are no notifications.
The start of the emoji experiment was very similar to that. I saw myself drawn to the emoji section. The pull was instinctive and independent of the response I was going to type in. When I felt this, it was clear to me why pursuing the experiment was justified.
My first slip happened 6 days into the experiment. It happened when I was talking to my closest friend. He was planning to resign from his current job and at one point, I ended up using an emoji because I did not know what to say or how to say it.
Side note: Since many of you might be wondering who discusses concerns of grave importance on text, the conversation did progress to a phone call. Of course, I am not a bad friend.
Throughout the life of the experiment, I took note of when and how I slipped, my relationship with the person I was talking to and the situation I was in.
The second one happened when I was talking to one of my seniors from my Uni days. A senior of mine who taught me more than my bachelor’s degree. I wanted to convey to him without embarrassing myself if “we could do the call at night because I don’t wake up in the morning”. I was too hesitant to type in just the words, so I slipped an emoji alongside it.
It is simple (not easy) to talk to friends and people you know without emojis, it is a whole other ballgame to talk to people you just met and want to make a good impression on.
I was meeting 71 brilliantly smart people from 42 countries with diverse professional backgrounds. I was joining my masters at ESCP business school, the oldest business school in the world, in less than a month of starting the experiment.
(I just like mentioning “the oldest thing”).
I did not crack under pressure and have been enduring the experiment with only 2 slips for the past 218 days (As of July 7th, ‘21).
Full disclaimer, I did use GIFs because I thought they were a medium of a creative outlet than an escape. I know we can debate that for emojis as well but I was careful and conscious that I did not use GIFs for the reasons I was using emojis.
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Consequences & Impact
The first typographical art was published in Puck magazine in 1881. The art form evolved over time and in 1998, Shigetaka Kurita published 176 picture characters and called them “emojis”. The impact has been so significant in the linguistic world that the Oxford Dictionary named the “face with tears of joy” emoji as its word of the year for 2015.
The network effect and the ability to express emotions without thinking(shortcuts) have enabled emojis to penetrate the world. The shortcuts in life are not necessarily bad but it is imperative to understand what we might be missing out on when we take a shortcut.
The understanding of the impact gets really interesting when we draw a parallel to the real world for this experiment.
Before we do that, there is a quote by Socrates which I love and on which I base my judgement on real-life conversations. My life has significantly changed after I have started using this principle in real life.
Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and weak minds discuss people.
Back to the parallel for the experiment: How many times have you responded with merely an emoji to a text? Parallelly, how many times have you responded with just an expression in a real-life conversation?
Impact #1
I found myself in a place where I had to read the text, understand the context and respond with a meaningful message every time I got a text because I couldn’t hide behind emoticons anymore. Gone were the days when I could simply send an emoji without considering the depth of the message received. We all do that multiple times on a daily basis in our life, look for it next time you use an emoticon.
Eradicating emojis, we are forced to think of what and how to address the question.
Impact #2
My second slip showed me that I am sometimes not brave enough to be vulnerable. When I realized there was nothing to fall back on, I had to be vulnerable to say what I wanted to. It has not only led to better conversations but I feel much closer to my folks than before.
Is it Worth It?
The short answer is: I don’t know.
Upon persevering in the experiment for 218 days, I don’t feel like I am losing anything. I do have gained a lot but the “worth and value” is personal. It depends on who you are and how you currently use emojis. When you start being conscious of using them, you may be able to crack the code if you need to pursue this project in your life.
The whole purpose of the project was to build stronger relationships with people I love through communication. Another side of the story was to express myself better without having the need to hide in the shadows.
Do I miss them? Very rarely now.
A final note to you: being vulnerable is being strong. If emojis help you do that, do you. Otherwise, I strongly believe that executing this project in your life might yield something of use, even if it is for a day!
Feel free to reach out to me for anything at srv.verve@gmail.com
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See you in the next one!
Imagine that I comment to this with a whatsapp text that says: 'I like it, it makes me smile' with no emoji, just words. Now imagine the same 'I like it, makes me smile' followed but a smiley face. Does the view of the smiley face help you see me smiling? Think about it :)